Hi,
It’s summer, a time to relax a bit and also become a bit introspective so I am going to take the time today to tell you a personal story.
“We need to accept the fact that we are not going to be grandparents.” These words, between my husband and I made it real. It wasn’t going to happen.
It was my daughter Chelsea’s birthday and the family was gathered for dinner. Chelsea got our attention, stood up and went to stand with her husband, John. “We have news,” she said. You guessed it, she was announcing her pregnancy and in that moment our lives changed, for the better.
We asked about her due date and she explained that is was August 10 but it would be earlier. She went on the say that twins always come earlier. Oh, my goodness. We were floored, excited and so very, very happy.
When we settled down my son announced that Chelsea wasn’t the only one, his wife was also pregnant and due August 20. To say we were gobsmacked hardly touches our feelings.
So, you have looked at your calendars and realize these dates are fast approaching. And, I plan, from time to time to talk about the experience.
Along with this regularly published newsletter, I do blog. And I will be talking about Becoming Grandma in my blog. Keep an eye on my twitter posts if you want to follow my story as it unfolds.
Meanwhile, I would love to hear from you. What is the most important tip you can give this potential Grandma?
Bringing Parenting Today to Your Venue
Parenting Today is keen to work with you as part of your professional development event, parenting workshop or workplace wellness support program. I offer keynotes and workshops, have written books and have ongoing newspaper columns, books, blogs and newsletters. And, no matter what the actual topic, they all share a basic value that I call
P.U.R.E. Parenting.
P — is a parenting plan
U — is unconditional love
R — is respect for your child as he is right now
E — is encouragement
These make up the framework of any resources that will come from Parenting Today. These four pillars are the essential ingredients for raising healthy children who will develop into capable young men and women.
I am based on the west coast but will be doing some traveling this Fall. I’ll be in Toronto September 8 to 10 and in Winnipeg from December 2 to 4. I am happy to extend these trips if you wish to book an event.
Congratulations Kathy – you are about to begin an adventure unparalleled in your life so far, from my experience. Your philosophy just continues as a grandparent – unconditional love – and asking how you can help. Both our children become parents in close succession and included a set of twins too and I had observed and listened as others became grandparents to help us figure it all out. I offered a day a week to each family (when we are in town) and that has worked for us for 8 years now. Depending on the stage and age and situation – sometimes the mom’s work an occasional day or do errands or work around at home. Of course some weeks there may be other needs or not – but it has enables me to devlop and know our grandchildren in a consistent, wonderful way but I am not the day-to-day caregiver. I am supporting our children and they know that we know and love them and are able to care for them if needed. I also try to have a turn with each one separately but now that 4 of them are in school it takes real planning. Once they got to school and are involved in some activities as well I realize how important those first 5 years were/are to our relationships.
I could go on and on but will stop and say – grandparenting is the icing on the cake and I know you will love it! I continue to enjoy your newsletters and so do our children!
Thank you for all you do for children and families!
Kathy
Thank you. I figure I will be helping a lot for the first month with both families and then, like you. develop a routine and also be available for special situations.
Congratulations Kathy! How wonderful! My sister is also expecting grand-twins in September — so this is very real to me too. Hope all goes well with both births and although I’m not a grandma (yet) myself — I have been told that it is a relationship like no other!
I am not coming at this from the grandparent perspective but the parent perspective as I have two sets of twins. Your daughter will be very lucky to have your support. The first year is brutal even more brutal than having one baby. As a parent I really wished I could have savoured more of the good times. Perhaps you can help with that.
Good luck and get some rest now while you can.
Hi Kathy. ! As you already know I am overjoyed for you and John. You are in for the ride of your life…better than ANY carousel, roller coaster or Orient Experess ! …I could go on all day about the bliss.
We have four little grandchildren Three boys six, three and eighteen months. We also have a little grand daughter…’enchanting ” is how my mother described her….a very apt choice of words !
This weekend almost our entire clan (on my husband’s side) gathered in Squamish for our neice’s 50th birthday . Our three little grandsons were there …the eldest making sure the band was setting up properly..the little red headed three year old charming the girls with his grin and telling me that “Yes Nanny it would be okay to be the only one at the party without any pants !! ” (His that is)..and the baby …catching rainwater from the dripping gutters in a cup …to drink …
It took a tag team to keep track of them…
The whole evening was a huge success…but I will skip to the “main point” …
I LOVE to dance..and over six years I have spent every Friday afternoon with our eldest grandson. One of our favorite activities is …dancing together. I put on his favorite rock star “Stewart Rod ” as he calls him…and we boogie away ! At the big 50th birthday party everyone was dancing together on the patio …in the rain… Number One Grandson comes over to Nanny to dance…the usual boogie “no holding ” stuff…when the music changes to a waltz. He looked a little confused…I said to him…”Usually when a gentleman dances with a lady they guide or “lead ” her”…as I showed him how to gently guide me with his hand around my waist and hand in hand…I could feel him relax..His face beamed …He WAS guiding me…His mother said he looked so proud to be just like a grown up…What I felt was a choking sensation in my throat…damp eyes and a feeling that I had done something right…as a grandmother…..
This is what I wish for you Kathy..and John
Love Lorraine